Tebow brings my blog back to life

I hadn't blogged yet this football season. I don't really know why. Maybe it's because I have a job, friends, family and shit to do other than sit around and type this meaningless blog that nobody ever reads. Maybe I didn't start blogging yet this year because Alabama's four wins this season haven't inspired me to do anything other that listen to Kirk Herbstreit talk about how much he loves Bama... well that, and drink beer in celebration because Bama is kicking some major ASS! Not even USC's upset against Washington was enough to bring me back. NOT EVEN the Lane Kiffin vs. Urban Meyer saga got me out of my daze. Not even Ole Miss' fall to the Evil Genious and so on and so on, But then the moment I had been waiting for happened. It actually freakin happened! A college football moment so grand. So perfect. So freakin wonderful that it would inspire me to hit the keyboard again and talk about college football in the way that only I can. It was the day Tebow went down.

Tim Tebow (also known as the Messiah, the greatest QB in the history of college football, the fuckin creme de la creme, the reason for Urben Myer's fat bonus) took a hit so hard that the entire UF nation got rocked. By the reaction of the 100,000 fans at the Swamp, you would have thought it was them that got the wind knocked out of them. Their hero went down so fast, and for a brief and satisfying moment Tebow lay on the gridiron, motionless. The stadium stood in silence, fans wide-eyed with dropped jaws watched in anticipation. "Please get up Tim ... pleeeeeeeeease get up." And then he did. But then he puked -- and a little part of me felt like a kid on Christmas. I mean, he was able to walk off the field. It's not like he died or something. Tebow's parents rushed to the front row. Every single coach, trainer, player and waterboy on UF's payroll huddled together over Tebow, and for the next 24 hours I saw the highlight again and again and again and again and then again. And for Christ's sake. The analysis. C'mon. It's a concussion and a case of the flu. It's not freaking terminal cancer. Ok, ok so you get it. I enjoyed watching Tebow appear human, instead of some holier than thou, macho leader that everyone puts on a pedistool, because he's more than a football player, he's a child of God .... and all that shit ... blah blah blah.

But perhaps the best part of the highlight is Kentucky's reaction to the whole fiasco. Of course, so much of the focus has been on Tebow's well-being, Tebow's head, Tebow's puke, Tebow's ambulance, Tebow's future, that I bet 99 out of 100 people would NOT know the name of the Kentucky player that dealt the nasty blow (except for Kentucky fans of course). Well his name is ... wait, I don't actually know. I am too lazy to look it up right now. Mind you, when the blow happened, it was late in the third quarter. Kentucky was already down 31-7, and Florida was on the edge of the red zone. After the player I will call "The Kentucky Badass" delivered the hit, he jumped for joy as if he had just won the game or something, body thumping and high-fiving his teammates as if the sack actually mattered. But it gets even better. Even after Tebow lay there motionless for awhile, the Kentucky defense continued to celebrate with "The Kentucky Badass." They showed no remorse. Not even an inckling of "Hey that was a great hit, hope he's OK." NOTHING. It was freakin beautiful, almost poetic. It was everything I wanted that moment to be.

Also humorous was the trainers' secret undercover, confidential way of handling a puking Tebow. They gave him a bag to chuck in while he was being carted off. Fine, I get that. Puke is gross and that stuff is better kept off the camera. But they put a towel over his head as he puked, to save him the embarassment of ... hmmm, I dunno, appearing human. God forbid the public see Tebow for what he really is ... a sick kid who just got the shit knocked out of him. And as Tebow was carted off, the entire UF nation experienced the same blow. They watched the rest of their season flash before their very eyes. And they didn't like what they saw. But then, they all breathed again when they heard it was just a concussion and he will likely be fine. Or will he?

And if this isn't one bunch of lucky bastards, I don't know who is, because even if Tebow is out for a week, a FULL freakin week, it wouldn't matter because UF has a bye next week. Well of course they do. Of course they do. Just their freakin luck. Because he will have so much rest between now and their LSU game, he will probably come back stronger than ever. A whole new Tebow. A Tebow, that for once in his God-loving life looked in the face of near failure, and then puked in front of 100,000 adoring fans. A Tebow that lay motionless while his opponents danced on his grave. A Tebow that got to experience being a real human being, if only for a few moments. And those few short moments were enough to move me, inspire me and get me back in the blogging game, even it is because somewhere, deep, DEEP down inside of me, I feel a tad bit sorry for the kid. After all, the hit was a double whammy. A Sack Platter with a side of Back of Head to Knee.

I can't wait until the press conference later this week. Ya know, the one where Tebow will get all fired up and say, "I AM SO SORRY. I AM SO SORRY FOR GETTING SACKED AND THEN HITTING MY HEAD ON MY TEAMMATES KNEE. YOU WILL NEVER SEE ANYBODY PLAY AS HARD AS I WILL FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON!" The reporters will tear up. The guys over at ESPN will piss themselves. The photographers will be moved into a 5-minute standing ovation. God himself will come down from the Heavens ... and a little part of me will die inside.

So Les Miles, get your crew of Cajun misfits ready ... because Tebow is coming to town!

Anyway, this blog entry is riddled with spelling and grammatical errors. Something I should be ashamed of because I actually get paid to catch and fix those mistakes, but whatever. This is my blog and I can say and do whatever the hell I want. It's not like anybody is reading it anyway.

Thanks, and until next time ... Roll Tide!

5 Reason the Braves CAN make the playoffs

When writing this, the blogger may have made some grammatical/spelling errors in her fury. Please excuse these **

1. Martin Prado: Since becoming a mainstay in the lineup, Prado has provided the Braves with a much-needed 'utility infielder.' But it became a 2-for-1 special when he got hot at the plate. Not only is he solid at the plate, but he can play ANYWHERE in the infield. This gives Bobby the option to give Chipper an extra day off here and there, and plug him into 2B, where Kelly Johnson was floundering (mostly at the plate.)

2. Nate McClouth: Possibly the most underestimated player in the starting lineup, McClouth hit the ground running when he arrived in Atlanta a few short months ago from Pittsburgh. He added something to the lineup that the Bravos needed since Furcal left for Hollywood -- SPEED! Have you seen this guy run? His speed is also a factor defensively. McClouth covers a lot of ground out there. Plus, he reminds me of David Eckstein, a true gamer who never slows down.

3. Tommy Hanson and Jair Jurrgens: Really, I could list the entire Braves pitching staff, but since these two were the biggest 'surprises', I mention them. Hanson is something special. Unfortunately, for Hanson and Jurrgens alike, they haven't always gotten the run support needed to show big numbers. But Hanson has an advantage as a rookie ... our opponents (namely our Philly counterparts who pose the biggest threat) haven't quite figured him out yet. He still has that new car smell! Both of these guys will have to be as good as they have been all year for the Braves to have any kind of post-season berth.

4. Fightin Phils aside, the NL East is pretty weak: I am nervous about saying this with so much baseball left to be played, but there is nobody else in the NL East other than Philidelphia that I see posing a threat to the Braves as far as winning the division goes. And as far as the Wild Card goes, I don't see that spot being represented by an NL East team, that will probably be reserved for the Central. And good, let 'em have it. If the Braves make it to October, I want them there outright, no Wild Card BS. It's unlikely the Marlins will make a good run for it, and notice I don't even broach the Nationals. Other than Philly, that leaves the Braves, and maybe, just maybe, the Mets. But the Mets have been plagued this season with injuries and errors. Bottom line, if the Braves stay hot, maybe the Phils will cool off and we will gain some ground on them. The key: to beat the Phils in head-on competition and take car of business.

5. Chipper and Yunel: You didn't think I would forget, did you? Both of these guys have a key role in the batting lineup, but just as important, they make a great team on the right side of the infield. It goes without saying that Chipper is a hall-of-famer on and off the field, but partnered with the Yunel, not much gets through on that side. Both are gold-glove defensive players, who have produced some plays this year that moved me to applause. Chipper's leadership also plays a big factor in the morale of the team. If he leads, they will follow. And Yunel's feisty personality gives the Braves the spark they need. Nothing like a hot-headed Cuban to bring a little life into a clubhouse. And the leadership and the spark combined will become increasingly more important as the season goes on. A positive mental state is a big part of performance.

***COMING SOON***

** 40 days and counting until College Football kicks off. Who will be the 'Wild Card' in the the SEC this year? Who has some work to do? And who will dominate this tough conference? DREAMS IN THE DOME: Who shows up BIG on opening day ... Bama or Va. Tech? Remember what happened last year when the ACC went head-on against Bama on opening day in the Dome? Will this year be a repeat, or does Va. Tech have a bone to pick?

** The Cubs are hot ... FOR NOW. But how long until they implode like so many years before?

** Milwaukee's own "Happy Youngster" is pissing people off all over the Cheese State. But does it matter? How much longer will the Brewers be relevant in the NL Central race anyway?

** The Machine, breaking down? NEVER, but he will be a free agent at some point? Do the Cards love him enough to shell out the dough, if not, who are the likely contenders to bid on Pujols. But, but, but, noooooooo, Al must stay in St. Louis! I will tell you why!

** Where the hell is Tim Hudson? The status of what could be a pitching weapon for the Braves ... if he ever returns. But if he comes back, who leaves? Nooo, don't say it... Hanson?

** Time for some good ol fashioned Manny bashing. This guy bothers me so much. Manny being Manny ... well if Manny is a complete pre-madonna with no class, no brains and absolutely NO integrity, than yes ... Manny being Manny.

Until then, Go Braves, Roll Tide, and AND MAY THE BEST TEAM WIN!!!!

Manny being Manny and Kayla being Kayla

** When writing this, the blogger became enraged and may have made some grammatical/spelling errors in her fury. Please excuse these **

As the "sports guru" of my group of friends, I am often asked to share my feelings and insight on the happenings in the sports world, especially when the issue at hand is one of national popularity. And this week's hot topic: Manny's 50-game suspension as a result of testing positive to banned substance.

So how do I, a sports lover "feel" about this. Well, I will get it out of the way.

First of all, let me say that thank god some other overpaid professional baseball player screwed up and got caught. I was getting pretty sick of the "A-Roid" scandal. But now the spotlight shines on Manny Ramirez, as if that's anything new.

I should tell you that there was a time when I actually liked Manny. His antics humored me and I didn't mind ESPN's highlight reel featuring "Manny being Manny." He is a curious case that always somewhat intrigued me. "How does this guy get away with it?" I asked. The sports media was quick to write it off as "Manny being Manny." It was then I realized something: This guy is getting a free pass. We all want to be that guy who gets away with more than he should and then is rewarded for "unorthodox" methods.

But it only took a few months before I, like the rest of Bean Town, grew tired of his constant childish acts. In a way, he is like that rambunctious, bright-eyed kid you see terrorizing his mother at a department store -- running through the aisles, screaming and playing hide and seek with other unsuspecting patrons -- at first it is kinda cute, but after you realize that the mother is doing nothing to stop him, it gets real old real fast. In this case that child is Manny and that mother is the top gun at the front office of a major league franchise. But then Manny ended up in the one place where is carelessness and free spirit who not only tolerated, but praised. I am talking, of course, of La La Land.

I was willing to let most of it go: I can live with the dreadlocks. I can live with the fact that he disappeared into the Green Monster in the middle of a game because he had to go to the bathroom. I can even live with his greedy agent Scott Boras who convinced him that he is worth more than an entire franchise. Bottom line ... for a while his antics seemed OK. He was "unorthodox" but he got the job done. But I have been waiting since the 2004 World Series for him to do something that would push me over the line from humored to annoyed. And lo and behold, the news breaks that Manny tested positive for a banned substance. Of course, ESPN broke the news as if the real tragedy was that Manny had been suspended for 50 games, not that Manny had contributed to the systemic plot to make everybody hate baseball.

I don't care if I don't see Manny play for 50 games. It's not like I won't see his face on every grueling hour of Sports Center. My point is, to care that Manny isn't on the field is exactly what he and Boras want. To care is only fueling the fire that is the Manny being Manny Show PR Extravaganza.

What I do care about is his blatant disregard of the rules and then his blatant lie to cover it up. "I didn't know" he pleaded. Manny, like so many others, claimed that he was prescribed the drug by an outside doctor and was unaware that the drug contained a substance on the list of banned substances.

Now I was enraged. Fuck you Manny!

This is bullshit on so many levels. Firstly, I will give him the benefit of the doubt: Maybe Manny didn't know. But how fuckin stupid is that? You are arguabley the biggest name in Major League Baseball. You are one of the most sought after interviews in sports media and EVERYONE watches every damn move you make and you can't take the time to cover your bases. What an asshole! I can tell you that he DOES know that the banned list exists, so he, and others like him, should be smart enough to double check the list of ingredients against the list of banned substances to assure there is no overlap. Surely Boras or any member of his overpaid possey could have taken on that task. But no, Manny didn't do that, well I guess that's just Manny being Manny.

And to all you whiney, West Coast dwelling Dodgers fans who are boo-hooing over the loss of your Jesus on Earth, I can guarentee that you will not have the best record in the NL by the time Manny returns. But quit your crying. Because I can also guarentee that your record when he returns will not be a result of his absense. You are jackasses for thinking that you could hold on to the top spot for 50 more games with or without Manny. Maybe you, "anything goes in Hollywood" fuckwads could learn a lesson from this. The rest of the world doesn't really care how cool California is. And MLB doesn't care either. Rules are rules and if i was in charge of MLB instead of that do-nothing, know-nothing worthless piece of shit Bud Selig, Manny's punishment would be much harsher. Oh, am I hurting your feelings with by bluntness?Well, what can I say, that's just Kayla being Kayla.

But the biggest jackasses in this whole situation are the members of the sports media who have somehow managed to put Manny on a high horse for all to look at in awe. "Gee Paw. One day I wanna be an obnoxious rule-breaking SOB pro baseball player just like Manny." He is like the Tim Tebow of baseball, except, unlike Tebow, Manny isn't that good of a guy. He is a big-headed zealot with no regard for anybody but himself. He didn't even apoligize to his teammates after the bad news broke. Asshole. Well, I guess that's just Manny being Manny.

The real tragedy here is that Baseball Tonight will be filled with "Manny updates", like anybody gives a fuck. I say we send him back to whatever island he came from and let the game of baseball resume with integrity, instead of losing support because of assholes like Manny who break the rules and continue to ruin the good name of our nation's pasttime.

Sorry folks, that's just Kayla being Kayla.

Thank you. That is all.

Fuck you Manny!

Dear ESPN

Dear ESPN,

First of all, it's nice to see that you have expanded your baseball coverage beyond the Yankees and Red Sox and reached the realm of the Tampa Rays. It only took them getting to the World Series for you to notice them. So does that mean the Royals are next?

Thanks for taking out the "Touch 'Em All" segment from "Baseball Tonight" and replacing it with "That's not Filthy, That's Nasty." I would say there is no reason that you can't keep both segments, but that would require you to cut out on John Kruk's screen time, and nobody wants that, right?

And it's a good thing that this year the "Baseball Tonight" crew is keeping score on Web Gems. I am sure you guys will figure out a way for a player from the Red Sox or the Yankees to win the whole thing in the end.

OH, and thanks for your constant, round-the-clock coverage of Mathew Stafford and Tim Tebow. It's a good thing you give me a daily update on how good Tebow is. As an Alabama fan, and a college football fan overall, I had no idea. Also, it's nice to know that you have nothing better for good ole Kirk Herbstriet to do during the off-season than stick a microphone in Stafford's face and talk about his NFL prospects.

Speaking of college football coverage, I love your Mike Leech, Texas Tech analysis. Now that Crabtree and Herrel are gone, how will a powerhouse football program such as Texas Tech ever recover? And on the same subject, I am so grateful for your detailed and constant updates on one of the most successful and deserving coaches in college football, Charlie Wiess. I mean, there is a lot to gloat about there with the fantastic season Notre Dame had last year. I mean, come on ESPN, why do you have such a hard-on for Weiss and the Fighting Irish? What the hell has he done lately that even resembles strong leadership and integrity. Besides, we all know that the crutches and the fashion-forward, Boca Raton style Hawaiian shirt at the Aloha Bowl were just part of a massive publicity stunt planned by your fantastic network. I am begging you ... TAKE CHARLIE WIESS' FAT, DOPEY FACE OFF MY SCREEN FOR 24 HOURS!!!!

It's a good thing that when discussing college football, you give 95% percent of the coverage to one of the following programs: Florida Gators, Ohio State, S. Cal, Texas Tech, Oklahoma, Notre Dame and Michigan. It's not like there are ANY other programs out there that actually matter. Forget the teams that are going to make a huge impact on college football next year. Never mind that Colt McCoy is returning to Texas for one more year, or are your heads so far up Sam Bradford's ass that you can't see Texas being relevant? Forget that Paul Johnson has started a new era in Georgia Tech football. Forget that Saban took Bama to an undefeated regular season after only winning half of their games the year before. Never mind that while you guys are drinking scotch and smoking cigars with Urban 'Look What I Can Do' Meyer, Houston Nutt is about to take over the SEC. That actually started last year, but you guys were way too busy kissing Tebow's ass to notice. And that's just the tip of the 'irrelevant information' iceberg that you guys didn't cover.

And to answer the burning questions that you ask EVERY DAMN DAY on "College Football Live" ... NO, Michigan will NOT BE GOOD next year! Stafford WILL be picked in the FIRST ROUND and NO, Charlie Wiess does not have a future at Notre Dame or in college football.

And on a more sensitive note. Good job on your coverage of Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart's tragic death. You gave the story a sensitive feel when posting on ESPN.com the day after his death this poll question: Which team will be the most hurt by their pitching? Choice A: The Angels Now that ESPN, is what I call class!

Oh, one last thing. Please tell Herbstriet that he looked great on camera last week. And don't forget to tell him to meet Kayla at 'The spot' at 5 pm Saturday. He knows what it means.

Sincerely,
The girl who loves you and hates you all with a big smile on her face!

Adenhart's tragic death hits home

Hello friends, readers and baseball fans. While my blog has typically been reserved for snark commentary and humorous criticism of the sports world, today I shift gears to touch on something that has saddened me and urged me to push for change among my friends.

After hearing about the tragic death of Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart, I was profoundly moved by the influx of e-mails and texts sent to me by friends and family who were also touched by the tragedy. Much of the discussion included the tragic nature of drunk driving.

One friend described the situation as one that "really hits home" because he knows two people whom within the last month were arrested for DUI.

Another friend in Chicago was outraged, calling the accident "100% preventable." And questioned that after something like this, "how could anybody drive drunk?"

A family member, during a discussion on the phone, said it was such "an awful awful thing to hear this about somebody so young."

And the saddest part of all is that all of these people are right. The issue should hit home, because if even YOU don't drink and drive, somebody who does choose to drink and drive could cause an accident that could take away your life or the lives of loved ones. People should be outraged because this is 100% preventable. And it is a crying shame that anyone, especially somebody so young, could be taken so tragically.

I write this entry with a heavy heart and tear-filled eyes. I know in my heart that I have driven drunk in the past. I am sorry to anyone, my parents included. I am ashamed. I vow to never do it again. I can only be grateful that this tragedy was a 'wake-up call' for me and several of my friends, who have also vowed to not drink and drive.

I encourage everyone out there to do the same. Below is the number and some information about a local car service that serves as an excellent alternative to traditional taxi services. To all my friends and family, I urge you to put the number in your phone and use it. And as always, if you know can't drive, ASK THE BARTENDER. Almost every bar in town has a cab service telephone number at hand that they will call for you.

As the silver lining of this tragedy, become one us ... BFADD (Baseball fans against drunk driving.) Cheesy I know, but perhaps you won't feel that way knowing that you made the right choice to not drink and drive and instead became part of something to prevent these senseless tragedies.

For anybody who saw the Angels game in dedication to Adenhart, you know how emotional it was. Players, one by one, ran out to the newly designed outfield wall where an image of Adenhart is displayed, to pay their respects. What really choked me up, was see two Angels plays holding Adenhart's jersey during the national anthem (pictured above). I was touched to see the shrine the fans built outside the stadium in memory of Adenhart.

Please please please I ask everyone to do their part to make sure that next time it isn't you or someone you love who is being mourned.

In closing, I would like to say that my heart and blessings go out to the families of Adenhart and the other two young men killed in that tragic accident, as well as anybody else who has lost a loved one as a result of drunk driving.

And to all the fans, broadcasters and my friends who gave this story umph, I thank you too for being a part of change for the better. God bless. My new motto in light of this incident: 'GET DRUNK! GET A CAB!'

FOR ANY LOCALS (MARIETTA/ATLANTA) HERE IS NUMBER AND SOME INFO OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED CAB SERVICE.

Company: Metro Cab Service
Info: Unlike most taxi services, Metro brings two drivers to each pickup. One driver drives you home in YOUR car, while the other follows. This is great for those of you, who like me, prefer to wake up the next morning knowing you have your car.
Cost: Metro charges $20 for the pickup and then standard cab fare per mile. It seems expensive, but it's totally worth it!
Phone: 770-507-3332

Bring on the baseball

Well folks, that special time of year is here. The weather is warm. The pollen count is high and the college football decorations come down from my walls to make way for the Braves pennant flags. Yup, baseball is here.

And for the first time that I can remember, I wasn't the only one showing enthusiasm for the start of the 2009-2010 season. Facebook was covered with comments from people expressing their excitement as baseball season kicked off today.
The Braves won their first game of the year in a highly publicized match up with the reining World Champs, the Philadelphia Phillies. I have yet to gather any other scores from around the league, as I was at work when the events took place. However, I am sure 30 minutes of the late-night edition of Baseball Tonight will catch me up. Which just brings up one more reason to love baseball season: ESPN's Baseball Tonight. The leader in sports coverage has always impressed me with in-depth analysis and round-the-clock highlights in ALL sports. However, of all their specialty sports programming, "Baseball Tonight" is by far the best. And for a young, passionate fan, who works in the evenings when most games are played, I must extend a thank you to ESPN for keeping me posted. Thank you.

The real party begins this Friday, when the lights come on in Turner Field and our own Atlanta Braves take the field for the first regular-season game of the season. In true Kayla tradition, I will be at the game. And of course, I will be partaking in a tailgating extravaganza before the game complete with food, friends and of course, beer. And to my friend Heather who thinks I drink too much, you ain't seen nothing yet. At least I can hold my own.

Peace y'all. And may we all have a wonderful baseball season.


PLAY BALL!

Obama puppy?

Why the f*ck couldn't I have been the Obama puppy.


HILARIOUS. From Pets who want to kill themselves.

Drama thy name is

You want drama? Head down to the plains of east Alabama, to Auburn.

How's this for drama:

The Tigers' past two coaches – Terry Bowden and Tommy Tuberville – have been successful, yet were forced to resign.

Auburn officials tried to go under the table to fire Tuberville and hire Bobby Petrino in 2003.

Auburn went undefeated in 2004 and got left out of the BCS championship game.

Tuberville fired two offensive coordinators in less than a year.

A New York Times story a few years ago accused Auburn of giving football players high grades without requiring them to attend class.

Rather than go for a win in the 1988 Sugar Bowl, former coach Pat Dye opted to a kick a field goal to notch a 16-16 tie against unbeaten Syracuse and kill any claims the Orange had on the national championship.

Auburn has been on major NCAA probation seven times.

Auburn alum Charles Barkley charged racism when the school hired Gene Chizik to replace Tuberville without interviewing Buffalo's Turner Gill.

So there you have it. Drama, thy name is Auburn.

From the notebook of Albert Press
Bama Fans Who Love to Watch Auburn Fail Association, founding member

Missing Texas already

So excuse me for getting a little sappy in this entry. I just arrived back from a bar mitzvah/family reunion/PAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY in Dallas, Texas. While the rain managed to follow us all the way to Texas and back, we didn't let that stop us from having a honky tonk good time.

I will start with a short list of things I did this weekend for the first time:
1. Danced the "Cotten Eye Joe" in a 50s style polka-dot dress in front of 75 people.
2. Woke up before 7 am after sleeping less than 4 hours three days in a row
3. Ate bagels and lox and drank zinfindel at the same meal
4. Watched a fine film about the gay movement in the 70s called "The Cockettes" starring a distant family member with my family.
5. Danced in red high heals
6. Flew on a delayed flight only to circle the airport for 45 minutes before landing
7. Drank locally-made beer with a distant cousin and several locals at a bar in Allen, Texas
9. Got in trouble for not wearing shoes in a synogogue
10. Sat inside a car made in 1929
11. Listened to the Grateful Dead only station on satellite radio in a Dodge Avenger
12. Danced to a Jonas Brother song with a group of tweenagers
13. Supplied alcohol to minors (dont worry, their parents gave me permission)
14. Ate a chocolate covered strawberry (and didn't like it!)
15. Got to party in a room full of Elvises, Jerry Garcias, Jackie Kennedys, Audrey Hepburns, Scarlett O'Haras, 1920s style gangers, hippies, 50s dancers, flapper girls, Pink Ladies and 80s punk-rockers

During my Aunt Lois' funeral a few months ago I realized how out of touch I had become with my family. Family from Dallas, New Jersey and even local residents gathered to mourn her death, and many I didn't recognize because of years of seperation and lack of contact. That weekend, I made a pledge that in memory of my aunt I would make strides to reconnect with my family. And I did.

The bar mitzvah in Dallas turned into a family reunion of sorts. All three nights I found myself in a hotel hospitality room or at the bar next door laughing myself into tears with my long-lost family. I had become so bored with my life in Atlanta, just going through the motions that I forgot the magic of 'the little things in life.' Thank god I was reminded this weekend.

Now that I am back home, I feel alive again. I am walking around with a smile on my face, chuckling to myself as I recall quips and moments from this weekend. Cousin Jay's impression of Aunt Lois was right on, and my cousin Leslie reminds me of, well, me, seven ago when I too was packing my bags and moving away from home for the first time to go to college. Cousin Ross is well on his way to being the next Jay Leno and Cousin Jay could do a nightly show on the Vegas Strip with his ability to captivate a room with his entertaining stories. For the first time in a long time I was inspired by something other than sports to write about on this blog. I think I saw my Uncle Howard laugh for the first time since losing Aunt Lois.



Ten glasses of wine, 12 cousins, eight meals, two hotel rooms, three sleepless nights, two pairs of VERY uncomfortable of high-healed shoes and one delayed flight later I am re-energized. For the first time in a long time I was too busy laughing with my family to be bothered with TV. And I actually laughed until it hurt so much that all I could do was laugh some more.

My job doesn't seem so awful anymore and my SLOOOOOOOW computer is not making me pull my hair out. Traffic isn't making my skin crawl and my own bed has never been more comfortable. Yes, I have been revitialized this weekend and I needed it.

Thank you to all who attended this weekend for making me laugh and reminding me what it truly means to be happy. I will never forget this weekend. Aunt Lois wouldn't have had it any other way.

** "If I died yesterday, I never would've known about this place." -Aunt Lois ***

Hanson hype: Tommy Hanson all the buzz at Braves spring training camp

Ever heard of a minor league pitcher Tommy Hanson? Well, if you haven't, you will soon.

Hanson, a 22-year-old right-hander from California, is turning heads at Braves spring training camp. While it appears that the starting rotation is set, word from camp says Hanson will be starting with the Braves this season.
Hanson has spent time with the Braves' minor league affiliates in both Myrtle Beach and Mississippi, as well as the Arizona Fall League. For the last few seasons Hanson has been touted at THE top prospect in the Braves organization, and perhaps in baseball. The raving reviews have cultivated a much anticipated major league debut by fans, broadcasters, coaches and even players. He's made a fan out of Chipper Jones. Chipper eagerly shared his thoughts on Hanson during camp. "The kid is going to be a No.1 starter in Atlanta soon. There's no holding him back," he said.

As a matter of fact, he's so good, Chipper thinks the Braves should find a way to get him starting from day one. "Even if I had to go to a six-man rotation. I would do it, just to get this kid some experience and get him on his way. I'd love to see him come down here and dazzle and make this club. I think he can pay immediate dividends," Chipper said.

Chipper's plan may not be that far off, but how long til we get to see the Amazing Tommy Hanson at Turner? Manager Bobby Cox sees Hanson starting in the near future. "It won't be long before he's up here," Cox predicted. He's way ahead of the game." Vague? Yes. But even Braves general manager Frank Wren is talking about Hanson in terms of major league pitching time. “He has turned into an outstanding young pitcher that is getting close to competing for a job at the major league level," he said.

So why all the hype?

He's hurling 94 mph fastballs with impeccable control, but his slider is the show stopper. It has been compared to the likes of John Smoltz. His power arm is said to be of top-of-the-rotation caliber. Scouting reports tout his slider as "devastating," and call him an "ace in the making."

Alright, so he can pitch! But if you want numbers to prove it, you'll find his stats impressive. Between Myrtle Beach and Mississippi, Hanson went 11-5 with a 2.41 ERA, 163 strikeouts and 52 walks in 138 innings. As good as Hanson was during the 2008 regular season, he was even nastier in the Arizona Fall League. He led the AFL in with five wins, a .63 ERA (that's right, .63 ERA!) and 49 strikeouts in 28 2/3 innings pitched, holding hitters to a .105 batting average.

But can he make it in the majors? We have all seen the tragic outcomes of same players that come to the majors after dominating in the minors. The standards are higher, the pressure tougher and everybody doesn't survive. Hanson is the ace in the minors. My hope is that Hanson IS the ace in the majors. While I want to see him pitch, I don't want the Braves to rush him to the top.

Ideally, Hanson would get called up just because Cox wanted to call him up and give him a chance, see how it goes. Realistically, he'll get the call when one of the top five gets hurt and he's a necessity. The difference between the two? If he's called up just for the hell of it, and it turns out he's not ready, his first appearance goes bunk, they can send him back down and go back to the regular rotation. But if one of the starters gets hurt, there is no "seeing if he's ready," because injuries are unpredictable. If he's not ready til June or July, but Vazquez gets hurt in April, ready or not, we need a pitcher.

Either way, Hanson plays this season! And he's just the beginning. The Braves are going the way of the Tampa Rays, like they did 4 or 5 years ago when they brought up a handful of guys from the farm system. Dubbed "the baby Braves," that crew included Brain McCann, Jeff Franceour and Kelly Johnson.

Closing thoughts: With all the scandal in baseball with steroids and greed, Hanson's story offers a breath of fresh air. No suspicion of steroid use, no dirty contract negotiations and over-the-top salary. Just a kid who loves the game, waiting for his chance to shine and live up to the Hanson hype.

Check out what others are saying about Hanson's talent:

“He’s totally dominated out here. He’s been tremendous.”
- Rocket Wheeler, Hanson’s manager with the Mesa Solar Sox in the fall league and his manager in parts of the past two seasons at Class A Myrtle Beach.

“I’ve never seen anything like it. I remember when I got over there [to Mississippi], I saw him throw a [bullpen session] and I’m like, ‘Gee, whiz.’ I saw him pitch and I think he struck out 12 in five innings. OK, that’s pretty good.”
-Mississippi and Mesa teammate Stephen Marek

“He’s something special. He’s something I’ve never seen before. Just from my experience last spring training, catching guys like Tim Hudson, John Smoltz — he’s right there with them, in my opinion."
-Tyler Flowers, Braves catching prospect

“He's been impressive. He’s really kind of separated himself from this league from a pitching standpoint. He just has a good look about him out there, being tall, the downward plane, spots his fastballs, three quality pitches. He looks like a guy who’s right there, knocking at the door.”
-Hall-of-Famer Ryan Sandberg, the former Chicago Cubs second baseman who’s a Solar Sox coach. “


* Photo: Bill Mitchell/Four Seam Images. Quotes taken from articles written by The Canadian Press and the AJC. See the full articles at the following links:

Canadian Press Story: http://www.google.com/hostednews/canadianpress/article/ALeqM5hir4A4WFRb8n0Nc4KyrdFNGwrh3g

AJC Story: http://www.ajc.com/sports/content/sports/braves/stories/2008/11/13/atlanta_braves_tommy_hanson.html

Who's in, who's out in the outfield

Opening thoughts: With spring training under way, there is no doubt that the Braves are looking at a fresh start. The Braves have a new look to their roster this year, especially with pitching.

Several newcomers have arrived, including Derek Lowe, Javier Vasquez (starting pitchers). A couple of veterans, including John Smoltz and Mark Texiera are gone. The injured are healing and making their way back (closer Mike Gonzalez, reliever Peter Moylan and left fielder Matt Diaz).

All signs point to a turnaround for the upcoming season. But some of last year's issues still loom.

Here is part of one of an ongoing Braves report, previewing the club in the weeks before the season starts.

Seven players, three spots and a platoon: a look at the outfield
Last season, the Braves outfield hit for combined 27 homeruns, the worst in MLB. What's in store for this season.

The center field spot is virtually open, as three have emerged as the top candidates who are vying it out for the top spot. They are, Josh Anderson, Gregor Blaco and Jordon Shafter. Blaco could fill the need for a leadoff hitter if he plays. He possesses speed, a quality lacking in the lineup. However, last season in 144 games played he hit only .251. However, he did lead the team with 13 stolen bases. Anderson appears to be the favored player with some major league experience from last year. That leaves top prospect Shafer. This is tough because it will come down to who performs when it matters most. Unfortunately, this method may prove to take a good chunk of the first part of the season. My belief, Shafer will be the breakout player of the year. While its unlikely he will start the season as the starter, I belive that down the stretch he will be the go-to guy. Regardless, all three of these guys will be on tap all season to fill holes when needed.

Left field also seems up for grabs despite the signing of Garrett Anderson. Matt Diaz is returning, and the Braves seem to be leaning toward a platoon for this position. The newest Brave, veteran Garrett Anderson, a lifetime Angel, will platoon this spot with Diaz.


Further, Anderson could fill the need for a strong clean-up hitter against right-handed pitching. The problem - he's is a bit of liability considering his age and injury history. The good news- he probably won't play everyday, and even if he AND Diaz both end up injured, there are the three aforementioned outfielders (Anderson, Blanco and Shafer, along with Brandon Jones) to fill the spot. The problem I see wiht both center and left is consistancy. Can the Braves find a plan, with the right outfielders that also contribute and fill holes in the batting order? Consistancy is not only key in the performance of the players, but also in the everyday lineup. While I support the 'platoon' philosophy, I think the Braves need a solid three in the outfield that go out there 90% percent of the time without changing the lineup around every day. This goes the same in the batting order. These guys need to get used to hitting before and after the same guy almost every day, and sharing the green with the same 2 other outfielders every day. Assuming Diaz plays quite a bit, he needs to step it up at the plate. Last year in 135 at-bats, he hit .244 in 43 games played with a .264 on-base-percentage. Backup Brandon Jones hit .267 with a .312 on-base-percentage in 116 at-bats in 41 games. I would like to see Diaz a little closer to .280. Brandon Jones however, impressed me last year and went somewhat underrated. Maybe this year he can get a change to clutch and show his stuff, and perhaps earn a more permanant spot.

This leaves up with the mysterious Jeff Franceour in right field. Let me preface this with a short story. I was at the September 2004 game when Franceour made his major league debut against the Cubs. He was called up with a lot of hype. He went 0-3 and then hit a homerun in the eight, his first in the majors. I felt like a part of Braves history that night. That being said, I was very upset to see Fraceour's, or as Bobby calls him, Frenchy, fall from grace, slowly and painfully last season. With 599 at-bats, the most on the Braves, he hit a terrible .239 with a .294 OBP and 0 stolen bases. He had 111 strikeouts, a sure sign of his eager youth and inability to 'wait for his pitch.'
Pitchers had him nailed before he even stepped up to the plate, knowing exactly which pitch he just 'couldn't lay off of. He looked weak both as an athlete and as a player. Mentally, he seemed discouraged and broken. Even a stint back in the minors couldn't bring him back to life. This season, a lot will be expected of Frenchy. We know he can hit, we've seen him do it. One thing's for sure, he has a helluva an arm. He can nail a guy trying to take home with a perfect rocket from deep right, into the glove of his longtime friend and Parkview High School teammate, Brian McCann. But Frenchy must pull it together, because if he can't do it, there is someone who can. I am sure that Anderson, Blano, Jones and Shafer would jump at the chance to play right field if they don't earn a spot in left or center. And, Bobby wouldn't hesitate (well he might) to put in one of the other guys even though they aren't right fielders by trade.

Baseball Report: Feb. 10, 2009

Baseball Report: Spring training starts next week.

Andrew Jones, alone on the range

You may have heard... Andruw Jones, once the finest center feilder in major league baseball, accepted an offer for $500,000 with the Rangers MINOR LEAGUE team. This is after the Yankees and the Braves put offers on the table. But don't feel sorry for him ... the Dodgers are still paying out his annual $3.5 million check. Talk about someone who is stealing his paycheck. The debate rages on as to why AJ would turn down offers to stay in LA, go to New York or return to Atlanta. The truth, he is lazy and doesn't want to listen to a hitting coach's advice. He wants to be where there is no pressure to perform. What a tool!!!! And to think I once respected the guy.

About the money?

In other news, Tom Glavine claims "it's not about the money," but yet remains undecided on whether to take the $2 million, $3 million with incentives, to walk into the sunset and finish his career in Atlanta, where it all began. He is playing the market, seeing if he can get the price up. Well, sounds to me like it is about the money, isn't is always?

Liar, liar comes under fire (and then comes clean)

And my favorite MLB story of the day... A-Rod comes clean, which is what he should have done. While it was wrong that the results of a cumulitive, confidential steroid test given to players in 2003 was leaked, it is time he manned up. After denying ever using steriods in an interview with Katie Couric, all seemed well. That was until Sports Illustrated broke a story saying he tested positive in 2003. The truth, this won't ruin A-Rod. It was several years ago, and the Yankees fans forgave Jason Giambi when he came clean. Breaking rules is bad, but lying about it is even worse.

The Fat Lady sung

In an effort to demonstrate sportsmanship, I would like to congratulate the entire Pittsburgh Steelers fan nation in taking their sixth Super Bowl victory back home.

The game of all games stayed true to its name giving viewers twists and turns that left the final to be decided with mere seconds on the clock. As a person without a dog in the fight, I was thrilled to watch such an exciting game. Penalties, penalties and penalties came from both sides, including three unnecessary roughness flags on the Steelers. Turnovers also kept the game interesting, as Arizona turned the ball over inches from their end zone on a James Harrison interception. Harrison returned the ball for a touchdown. It was a 100-yard rush, the longest in Super Bowl history.

Other firsts in Super Bowl XVIII: Mike Tomlin became the youngest coach to win the Super Bowl; Arizona scored the first safety in game history and; the Cardinals featured the first Australian native ever to play in the Super Bowl.

The game was a nail-biter, even for neutral fans. Now that says something. The Cardinals came back from a 20-7 deficit in the fourth quarter, scored a passing touchdown, then a safety, making it a 4 point game at 20-16. Than Larry Fitzgerald found a hole and took it to the house to take the lead at 23-20.

Not missing a beat, Pittsburgh took the lead back with less than a minute remaining on a sweeeeeeeet Holmes touchdown. With only seconds left, the Steelers kicked the extra point making it a 4-point game at 27-23.

The Cardinals rushed to move the ball, and were forced to an unsuccessful Hail Mary.

A heart breaker yes, but also a game I am glad I watched in its entirety.

And for the record, I picked the Cardinals. But I won't lose sleep over it.

Coach Mike Tumlin had this to say at the trophy ceremony: "Steelers football is 60 minutes. It ain't always goin' to be pretty. Throw style points out the window. These guys are in it till the end."

I will not venture into the half-time show featuring Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band or the commercials. That is a different entry all together.

Confessions of a college football fanatic

For thirteen weeks I woke up early every Saturday to watch ESPN's College Gameday. Now, a month after college football's grand finale, I already miss it. I can hardly sleep on Friday nights, the excitment of gameday gets me jazzed.

I run through the day in my head. Who plays at noon? Who kicks off at 3:30 and who plays into the night? Will I eat before or during the Bama game? Ooh no, I forgot which channel Bama is on ...damn it, I need to go look it up. Will I be able to see the end of the Georgia, Tennesse game before the Bama game starts? Can we really beat them? Who will Kirk pick to win? I wonder what cool costume Lee Corso will whip out. ... It's no wonder I can't sleep. But waking up Saturay morning is the best. It's like Christmas.

Since most games are crammed into one day a week for only 13 weeks, the fans often find themselves changing channels frequently in an effort to not only watch, but keep up. The truth is: Watching college football as an avid fan can be a lot of work.

Let's face it...If you saw the notorious Graham Herrel, Michael Crabtree pass for the first time as a replay, you missed out on the initial shock value. But, you can't watch them all live all the time.

The week leading up to a big game gets fans pumped. I know, I know, I can't wait! But the hour before kick-off, things feel surreal. It's actually here!

The pleasures of gameday are all around, for me and most hardcore fans. The energy as the team runs out of the tunnel, the crowd chanting. The way the stadium rocks, packed in with football-crazed fans. The nervousness as the quarterback hangs back in the pocket before his move. The frustration with penalties and bad calls. The impatience waiting for a play to reviewed. The excitiment of a running back weaving and dodging as he busts through the defense and makes a break for it. The shock of blocked field goals, missed cues and turnovers. The seeminly slow motion moments as the ball flies through the air on a Hale Mary pass. The nail-biting intensity praying your team can pull out the upset in the final seconds.


Ahh. It's all there. And without it, Saturday is not the same. To all the hardcore, nutjob, obsessive college football fans out there like me,remember:It's only eight months away.

See you next season!!!

Tim Tebow ascending directly into Heaven

MIAMI (SP) -- Shortly after leading the Florida Gators to a national championship with a 24-14 win over Oklahoma, junior quarterback Tim Tebow announced that he would skip his senior season and ascend directly into heaven.

Tebow entered the press room to wild applause. A reporter for a 24-hour cable sports network burst into tears when the 2007 Heisman winner entered the room. Another threw a pair of boxer shorts on the podium. Tebow smiled at the gesture and several sports reporters fainted.

"Sorry I'm late," Tebow began. "There was a six-year-old boy with cancer in row 54 and I had to make my way through the crowd to heal him."

"I want to start by saying that playing quarterback for the University of Florida, winning two national championships, has been a great honor. There has been some speculation about my future and I want to clear that up right now," he continued.

"Don't go, Tim!" a reporter shouted from the back of the room.

"After much consideration, I have decided to skip my senior season at the University of Florida and ascend directly into Heaven," Tebow announced. Upon making the announcement, Tebow was bathed in a blinding white light and vanished.

In response to the news, ESPN announced they will have a month-long tribute to Tebow. ESPN2 will now be known as ESPN-TEBOW and will feature Tebow highlights (including home videos of Tebow's childhood), re-airings of past interviews, Tebow-centric analysis by ESPN air personalities, a Tebow quiz show and a reality show to find
the "most Tebow-like" person in America.

"He wasn't just the greatest player in college football history," said a college football writer at the press conference, tears streaming down his face. "He might have been the greatest person to ever walk on earth."




Albert Press